As published in the June 2013 issue of Vitality Magazine
Having gone through a relationship break-up recently, I am reminded of how effective homeopathy can be in processing negative emotions and mending a broken heart. Friends and family were commenting on how well I was handling the whole thing and what a positive outlook I maintained. What they didn’t realize is that every time they weren’t looking I had a little white pellet under my tongue.
Seeking homeopathic treatment to mend a broken heart may seem unusual. People typically pay me a visit when suffering with physical ailments such as headaches, joint pain, insomnia, and the like. Throughout their journey of physical healing, many are pleasantly surprised to find that homeopathy is also quite helpful in dealing with matters of the heart. In addition to having their physical ailments clear up, patients report feeling happier, more motivated, more confident, and able to deal with stressful situations with more ease. With a renewed sense of well-being and emotional strength people can overcome major stresses, such as relationship break-ups.
Negative emotions following a failed relationship can manifest as sadness, depression, anger, jealousy, isolation, withdrawing from favourite activities, indulg-ing in addictive substances, crying, seeking revenge, blaming self, lowered self-confidence, anxiety, and many others.
One woman, in her early forties, came for help with indigestion and heartburn. Her digestive problems began shortly after her divorce. The stress of the relationship break-up coupled with having to raise three children without help kept her in a cycle of frustration and anger. She admitted to having violent outbursts and was afraid of losing control and striking one of her children.
The remedy Syphilinum helped this woman process her anger quickly. Within days of taking the homeopathic remedy, the feeling of “threatened violence” completely disappeared. Six weeks later she reported feeling much calmer, less angry, and able to “let go” more easily.
Kailey sought help for painful and frequent urination due to chronic bladder infections. The beginning of the infections corresponded with the break-up of her relationship; her fiancé broke their engagement weeks before the wedding. She felt devastated, angry, and humiliated.
One month after beginning the prescribed remedy Staphisagria, Kailey reported feeling less angry and more accepting. What she had suspected all along became very clear to her. “He was not the right man for me anyway,” she admitted. Kailey became more accepting of the break-up and felt that her dignity was restored.
Homeopathy is a medical science that aims to heal the whole person; mind, body, emotions, and spirit. The Greek philosopher Plato (428-348 BC) said that physicians are misguided in considering the soul and body as separate when treating illness. How we think and feel affects our physical being. Prolonged grief and negative emotions can give rise to physical illnesses. A well-prescribed homeopathic remedy can reverse illnesses and help heal the emotions.
Homeopathic remedies are prescribed after extensive case-taking, based on the sum of all physical and emotional expressions, called constitutional treatment. This constitutional remedy can bring new perspective and awareness to old situations and problems. It can help with the processing of negative emotions quickly and help one move on with more ease.
With the conventional medical approach patients are classified with disease names and treated with the standard protocol assigned to that disease. As a result, people with very little in common will get the exact same treatment. In homeopathic prescribing, the remedy is based on the individual rather than the disease name. As such, ten people diagnosed with “anxiety disorder” are likely to receive ten different homeopathic remedies.
Insomnia was the main reason for Michael’s visit to my office. He reported lying awake for hours and feeling tired all day as a result. Michael suffered from anxiety and started drinking on a daily basis to help calm himself. As Michael told his story, it became apparent that both the anxiety and loss of sleep were triggered by Michael’s recent relationship break-up. He started using alcohol as his coping mechanism to dull the pain of missing his girlfriend. The more he drank, the worse his insomnia became.
With the remedy Sulphur, Michael’s anxiety reduced significantly. He was once again able to sleep through the night and reduced his drinking to the occasional glass of wine with dinner.
How we deal with a broken heart and disappointments in general is determined by our self-esteem and emotional health. Feelings such as anger, depression, anxiety, and grief are compensatory strategies we develop in order to deal with difficult emotions. While these strategies allow us to cope with difficult feelings, they can become blocks to our emotional growth. When left untreated, these blocks can become physical illnesses.
Following a huge argument and subsequent relationship break-up, Cloe, a seventeen-year-old girl, became severely depressed. Before bringing her for an appointment, Cloe’s mother consulted me in private. Cloe had stopped eating, going out, and engaging in her favourite activities. After school she stayed in her room, listening to music, crying, or talking on the phone. What concerned Cloe’s mother the most was a phone call from Cloe’s best friend telling her that Cloe was having suicidal thoughts and had mentioned to her friend she no longer wanted to live.
After meeting Cloe, listening to her story, and gathering information on her emotional as well as physical symptoms, I prescribed the remedy Naja. I also asked Cloe’s mother to monitor Cloe’s behaviour and contact me with a weekly report.
In the first week following the remedy, Cloe was interacting with family members a little more, rather than staying in her room all evening. Her appetite had also increased somewhat. Cloe’s social interaction and appetite gradually increased in the weeks to follow. She started going out again and becoming more “her old self.”
James started following his girlfriend to confirm his suspicion of infidelity. The thirty-six-year-old banker was devastated to confirm his notion. What was most shocking was that the other man was his friend. James confronted the man, uttering threats of violence. After ending the relationship, he continued follow her and even confronted the couple in a restaurant.
Not wanting to “do something stupid,” James sought help to deal with his feelings of jealousy. I prescribed the remedy Hyosciamus. During our follow-up meeting James reported feeling much calmer and more accepting of the situation. He still felt hurt, and a little jealous, but said he was surprised at his past behaviour and would not stoop so low again.
Relationship break-ups can be one of the most difficult and emotional things we can go through. Although there is no way of avoiding the sadness, grief, and a host of negative emotions associated, the right homeopathic remedy can help accelerate the processing of these emotions.
Homeopathy can help us manage what’s happened in a healthy and timely manner. It can bring awareness and perspective to the situations. The awareness can teach us lessons and help us move forward, healthier and stronger than ever before.
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